Two Sisters: Hannah & Lily

Warm January Park Day

2012-01-16T16:55:00.000-08:00

The weather was in the 50's early last week --

perfect chance to get to the park for some fun & to play with my camera.

Hannah was more than eager to pose for me .. Lily posed as long as I promised for LOTS of swing & play time!

Sweet miss Lily ...

Forever with "Baby" ...

Not sure how she is going to go to kindergarten next year without Baby but we have time to work on the separation issues.

And Miss Hannah ...

Someone has watched a lot of episodes of America's Next Top Model ...

Action shot .. lost her shoe mid air

And just being a kid ... like she should be!!

Sweet girls that I am forever thankful for!

Forever a blessing!

Thank you, Lord, that life really is good!

Here Comes 2012 ... from The Abandoned Blog

2011-12-25T15:44:00.000-08:00

I guess I underestimated the busyness of working full time & being a single Mom. Life has just taken on a new kind of chaos.

All good but, wow, I feel like we have been living at warp speed since September!!

Two hospital stays .. all of our birthdays ..full time work ..

full time sales goals ... meals .. laundry ... keeping the house semi-clean...... getting together with friends ... ... etc, etc!

Feels like life is just on overdrive & the blog has been completely neglected.

I guess better to neglect the blog than my girls!

Hannah & Lily are doing great!!!!

Lily was SO excited for Santa to arrive. I mean S.O. E.X.C.I.T.E.D.!

When she saw the gifts this morning she yelled, "we have to send Santa a Thank You note!"

Lily is in preschool / daycare full time & doing great. She is just an amazing child in every way & God has certainly given her the grace to handle every one of life's unimaginable situations. God is so good & continues to bless her with a happy heart, a quick laugh & a tender spirit. If you ask Lily who loves her the most, she says, "Jesus!" ... it so sweet. She also has a very long list of all the people that love her. Her list usually starts out with Auntie Mom (Kim).... then "T" ... Uncle ... Raw ... Michael .. Maffhew ("but he doesn't live there anymore", she says). So sweet how my girl forever knows how loved she is by our Slazas family!

Lily got to meet Santa & the Mrs.at pre-school. She was SO excited & had planned to tell Santa she wanted a "kindle fire" for Christmas -- she saw a commercial & liked it. Umm? She doesn't read but she liked it!

As soon as she sat on Santa's lap she got so nervous & told him she wanted "a new train set."

I have no idea where that came from but it cracked me up!

The girls & I went to my sister's place in Indy for 2 nights.

Got to spend time with the cousins, which they all loved!

Lily & Julia just disappear playing with dolls, barbies & make-up.

So glad my sis lives right up the road (115 miles or so).

It is great that we get to make memories together with our kids ..

even if those memories on this trip included

drugging her up & taking her for an MRI on her neck.

Love you, Mir!!

Out to dinner before Taylor Swift concert on my 40th birthday.

Poor sweet girl was just out of the hospital from pneumonia.

Look how tall she is! We wear the same size shoe!?!

Hannah is healthy & doing great -- my girl can cook & has recently been cooking dinners before Lily & I get home.

Yes, cooking dinners on occasion!! One night was chicken & pasta and it was delicious!!

She is busy planning a dance class for some of Lily's preschool friends.

For part of her Christmas break she volunteered at Lily's school to help with the kids.

She would rather be there than her own 4th grade class. The kids adore her & she is SO good with them.

I am so proud of her & so thankful for her gorgeous smile, her common sense, love for others, kindness & her tenderness towards Lily.

The girls have separate rooms but they sleep together in Lily's room every night. One night I overheard them talking & giggling .. Lily said "Mom is gonna tell us to go to sleep." and Hannah said "Nah! She loves that we are friends." It was so sweet ...and Hannah was so right. I am so thankful that these sisters separated by 6 years are such good friends. Thank you, Lord!

I will close this last 2011 post by saying how incredibly hard the year 2011 was for me.

Maybe it was just the compounded emotions of several tough years but last year at this time I

was going through the worst time in my life.

Thankfully there are some life long friends that encouraged me,

loved me, reached out to me when the times were very tough.

It is the grace of God that I made it through this past year

& still have my sanity (well, at least, half of it!).

Kentucky has been good to us.

My neighbor mowed my lawn all summer (an acre!).

Another person blessed me & the girls with a stack of gift cards so we could eat out.

Lily's teacher, Jo, was AMAZING & so encouraging

as many days I came home to get back in bed & cry.

Life is not what I thought it would be in Kentucky but God knew

and life is so much better than what I thought it would be!

All God's Best from HOME,

Two Birthdays: Two Hospital Admissions

2011-11-15T10:26:00.001-08:00

Hannah turns 10 today.

Ten.

A decade.

Hannah is the prize. What a gift her life is. To me. To so many.

I am so thankful to be her mom and to have walked some very tough roads along side her.

"It's a girl" .. 1:11pm, 11/15/01.

We have had some crazy health issues going on over here.

After my last post, Hannah came down with pneumonia & got admitted to the hospital for IV anti-biotics.

She got discharged the day before my 40th birthday.

We celebrated on my 40th by going to a Taylor Swift concert & had some awesome Mexican food!

Last week I got sick. Sicker than I have ever been in my entire life.

Felt like "death would have been a relief" kind of sick.

By Friday I got admitted to the hospital for pneumonia & spent the weekend there.

Got discharged last night with doctor's orders to stay home in bed & rest this week.

Kim said, "you can do that, Deb!" ..... My best friend knows me so well!!

Thankful Hannah & I are both out of the hospital.

Thankful for IV antibiotics, wonderful nurses & docs at

Brownsboro Hospital & Kosair Children's Hospital,

thankful for my work that hasn't fired me yet (!?!),

thankful for a home to come home to with girls that are my heart.

Life is good.

Even when I was so sick I had a few good laughs with the nurses & xray techs.

You just have to make the best of it all ... even when you are coughing up a lung .. or two.

Happy birthday to my most precious treasure of a double digit child.

You make my heart so happy, Hannah!

You have brought me endless joy & happiness for the past decade!

I am forever thankful for God's amazing healing hand on your life.

You are a walking testament to the power of prayer & the healing hand of God.

Happy 10th Birthday

Miss Hannah Rose Eriksen.

9lbs 1oz born as healthy as could be on 11.15.2001

You are most loved ... forever!

How Cute Is She?

2011-10-26T15:22:00.000-07:00

Miss Lily has done some modeling for me.

I just love when she agrees to get in front of the camera.

She is beyond adorable in every way.

Fall in Kentucky is SO beautiful!

This is our second Fall living here & I just LOVE the colors & the leaves.

Beyond gorgeous.

I just wish we lived closer to Idaho so Lily could get some Auntie Mom love on a regular basis!

Kim suggested I ask Obama to see if he could do something about how far Kentucky is from Idaho.

I am going to at least ask -- I know what he will say: Yes, we can!

Hannah has been sick since last Thursday night. She always runs a high fevers.

She sounds like she is going to cough up a lung but no pneumonia & her blood counts are normal.

Platelets are a little low but that is fine for her.

We always have so much to be thankful for!

What Haven't We Been Up To?

2011-10-16T19:42:00.000-07:00

Life has taken on a new kind of crazy. Single Mom. Full time work. Full time loving on the girls. Overtime thinking about their needs, my needs, the house, work, soccer, the car, you name it ... & how to juggle it all.

It seems like the kind of crazy where I am behind on everything: my blog, my friends, laundry, cleaning, you name it ... it's a miracle my bed is even made right now. In the midst of days that seem very long, I just remind myself of one thing that I NEVER take for granted: my kids are healthy. I am juggling normal life right now ... not blood transfusions, hospital stays & doctor appointments. This is what I dreamed of ... and I do cherish it all. I am just cherishing it at a very fast pace!

I love my job. Love the people in my office & the clients that I am working with. SO thankful for this job ... for the pay ... for the benefits ... and for the distraction to focus on something outside of the house.

Hannah is on Fall Break for this week. She is going to be working / volunteering at Lily's pre-school. She is so excited to be with the kids!! This is her dream -- she tells me that one day she wants to be a Mom, a pre-school teacher & a consultant with Scentsy (under you, DeMaris!! ..She told me herself!!)

Here are some pictures of what we have been up to ...

On the first of October we celebrated "Sisters Forever Day". Hard to believe it has been 3 years since we stepped off the plane at LAX for Hannah to meet her baby sister. We went to dinner and then went to paint some pottery. A wonderful night!

Here are the girls during our celebration evening:

This weekend we went to the Pumpkin Patch for a hayride & a picnic

America's Next Top Model ... Always on her mind, even at the pumpkin patch!

Picnic time ... Hannah picked the spot under a tree.

Beautiful day with my two treasures!!

Climbing around the hay castle ...

Life is good.

It's a new kind of crazy-busy but I am thankful for the life we have!

I don't take it for granted. It can all change in an instant.

Cherish it all!

All God's best from HOME,

Party Time

2011-09-21T17:29:00.000-07:00

Super easy party.

Great Kentucky friends.

Fun time.

Wonderful memories!

Life is good & Lily is four.

Precious Treasure Turns F.O.U.R.

2011-09-15T17:40:00.000-07:00

Hard to believe ...

SHE IS FOUR!!!!!

Lily woke up this morning & measured herself ....
to see if she was bigger.

And, of course, I helped her measure so that she measured "bigger".

She is bigger ... Right??

My girl is 4.

My girl that brings the joy, the crazy, the fun, the sweetness, the tenderness, the empathy,
the laughter & all the wonderful things that she is.

She has my heart in every way.

She is the most persistent child I have ever met.
She is beyond determined & has a the mind of an engineer at an early age.

Hannah & I joke saying, "Lily, NASA called & they want you to come give a lecture to the team in Houston."
This girl figures it all out in no time & wants to understand how all things work.

The Lord gifted us with each other &
I am forever thankful that God chose this path to China for sweet precious Lily!

Her life is such a gift .. to me, to her sister, to our family & to so many.

God always gives good gifts
& He does more than I ever think or imagine ...

Lily is far beyond what I ever thought or imagined for daughter #2.

Happy Birthday, Miss Lily Sha Hope!!!
You are a treasure &
I will never stop thanking the Lord for YOU!

Gone Redneck ... & Corporate

2011-09-13T04:58:00.000-07:00

Life has been busy as all get out ... but we are loving it all!!!

My sister was here last week for 2 nights & I went totally Redneck.

After a night on the town

(read: dinner at Texas Roadhouse & hours at Hobby Lobby)

I was driving her mini-van (the twin to my mini-van) &

decided to give her "door to door" service (read: Redneck parking).

I parked her van right up on my lawn.

We have never laughed so hard &

I could have cared less what the neighbors thought ...

Her van sat parked here for over 24 hours.

Life here in the South is just a lot of good ole' fun!!

The girls & I are totally adjusted to the new routine of me working full time.

Hannah says "I really like our new schedule."

Lily is SO happy with the new full time pre-school schedule.

She has adjusted so well & loves that each day is a school day.

The routine of it all has been so good for her!!

I am so thankful that we have all transitioned so well to me working full time.

I waited a long time, purposely, for me to go back to work full time.

There is a time for everything & this is certainly the right time for me to be working.

Mostly, I am just thankful for how well the girls are doing.

They are all that matter to me.

If it wasn't right for me to be working now, we'd live on welfare & beans & rice.

I am not kidding.

I will do whatever I have to do for my girls but I will not

sacrafice their emotional well being for a paycheck.

Thankfully, they are doing great with me working ...

So get out the frying pan, I love my job ...

Momma is going to bring home the bacon!!!

So while I might park on the front lawn at times,

Monday to Friday I am in heels with my hair brushed & make-up on.

A New Day for this girl ..

Life is good &

I am forever so thankful for the good gifts that the Lord always gives!!!

All God's best from HOME,

Health & Freedom

2011-08-31T18:25:00.000-07:00

A dream came true this summer.

I rode on the tube with both of my girls at the same time.

This has been a dream since before Lily even came home from China.

Hannah's health issues delayed this experience for two summers.

What a gift.

And what a gift to live in this country and to have so many freedoms!

Hannah's long time babysitter, Jenn, (from California) has a brave brother,

Justin, that has been serving with the US Marines.

This past week has been a nightmare for Justin & his family.

Justin was hit by an IED ...and has extensive injuries.

This is a dear, sweet, caring family.

Please pray for Justin & his family: Jenn, his sister & parents Maureen & Cliff.

They were all reunited today in Maryland for the very long road of healing & recovery.

It will not be easy and life will never be the same.

Justin, thank you for your incredible service & sacrifice.

Our prayers are with you for your healing &

for your entire family to sense the peace of God in the midst of this difficult road.

Life is so short.

Treasure the moments.

Never taking my health or freedom for granted ...

All God's best from HOME,

Plain & Simple ...

2011-08-22T18:56:00.000-07:00

Last week was a great week.

I took a job. Haven't started yet but I am gearing up & ready to go!

Back to doing outside sales in the corporate world.

I know it will be a lot of fun.

I really can't believe they are going to pay me to talk to people & make friends all the live long day.

Don't they know I'd do this for free?

Hannah, Blair & I went to the Lady Antebellum concert on Thursday night.

They were incredible but the BEST part was watching Hannah sing along & dance in the row.

She is so alive ...so full of life ... and I am so thankful!!!

Friday was Open House at Lily's Pre-school. Super fun.

Lily was given about 20 tatoos which she put ALL over her body as soon as we got home.

Just finally got them all off tonight (4 days later!)

While at the Open House, a friend told Hannah about a karaoke

competition for kids at the KY State Fair.

So off we went to the fair ... for Hannah to sing her heart out.

She did move on to the semi-finals but didn't make it to the finals.

She rocked the stage ... owned it & had a blast.

She was so super excited when she came off stage --

honestly, you would have thought she had won based on her enthusiasm.

Here are some pictures from our great week in KY:

On our way to Lady A concert ... one of the best nights ever.

Lily took this picture before we left.

Yes, she's 3 but she can work the Canon DSLR.

At the State Fair for the karaoke contest.

Just had to get a picture with this sign. Not often we see our last name spelled correctly.

This was a booth for "Eriksen Chiropractic"

.. no relation to us.

On stage ready for her first performance ... she calls this her "home."

Being called back onto the stage to move on to the "semi-final" round.

She was over the moon!!

Lily (and "Baby") in the tricycle race at the Fair.

Isn't she so adorbale?

We have been having some sweet times together ...

L.O.V.E. this girl!!

Oops ... "Baby" got stuck under the back wheel.

Hannah working the stage during the semi-finals.

She had an absolute blast performing!!

Can't go to the fair without doing the rides.

This picture is from before some crazy ride. I should have taken a picture afterward ... oh my!

Don't think I will be doing this ride again next year.

I was scared out of my mind on this thing.

When did I become such a wimp ...

and why is my thumb double jointed?

Yikes.

Life is good.

no matter what craziness is going on

... and I know me a lot of crazy!

All God's best from HOME,

Back in the Swing of Things in KY

2011-08-15T21:19:00.000-07:00

Well, I love Kentucky. Just love it.

Life here is relaxed ..

less crowded... easier ... kinder.

The South (even, here, just shy of the Mason-Dixon line)

is a great place to live.

I will never regret raising my girls in this beautiful place!!

We are in the swing of things for the Fall Season.

School is awesome.

Hannah's 4th grade teacher is a man. First time she has ever had a male teacher.

Wonderful for her to have a male role model at school each day.

I asked her tonight how he does with the boys that are sometimes out of control.

She said "Oh, he has magical powers over with those crazy boys."

So glad for her teacher with the "magical powers"...

I am counting on him.

Here are some pictures from this past week ...

at the park:

And at Hannah's school today for lunch ...

Hannah is signed up for soccer

& guess who is going to be a coach?

Aaaaah ... yes, that would be (crazy) me.

This girl that never played a day of soccer in her life.

So I will stand on the sidelines & cheer ...

what more do they need at age 9 ...

Well, maybe more?

Thankfully, I think another mom will coach with me.

She knows more about soccer.

Yippie for co-coaching!!

I am prepping the girls for me to go back to work full time in September.

I know all of my discussions about how things are going to change will pay off.

The girls are ready ...and so am I.

I am so excited to get "back out there" striving for annual goals.

It will be fun to be back in the field & doing what comes natural to me.

Life is good.

We are three very blessed girls living up life in Kentucky ...

in a home filled with peace!

Thank you, Lord!!!

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"The nearness of God is my good; I have made the Lord God my refuge." Psalm 73:28

"The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the person who seeks Him." Lamentations 3:25

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All God's best from HOME in KENTUCKY,

First Day of School & Three Years Since Referral

2011-08-11T19:45:00.000-07:00

Today is three years.

Three years since we drove to Sierra Madre to get the photos of Lily's referral pictures.

This precious gem of a girl brings joy & laughter every day!!!

Here she is today with her referral photos.

She wasn't too interested in a "photo shoot" but I did the best that I could.

I will never forget that day of seeing her happy face for the first time:

8/11/08.

Her smile brought much needed joy all the way from China!

I am so blessed to be her mom.

There are no words for what her joy has brought

in the midst of Roisin's passing, Hannah's illness & the loss of my marriage.

The Lord always gives good gifts ...

He knew I'd need her.

Exactly HER.

I am so thankful for HIS PERFECT plan ..

even when I don't understand the details

that involve tremendous pain & waiting on Him.

God is good!

On a separate note, we hit the ground running this week:

landed from Idaho, shopped for school supplies, packed the bag & lunch ...

and got Hannah off to her first day of 4th grade!

To see her riding the bus is a gift.

My girl that lived on blood transfusions,

lived life for over 160 days on a hospital unit is now entering 4th grade.

Life is good ...

all of it,

even my alarm at 6:30AM.

I wouldn't trade that alarm clock for an IV pole & hospital unit for anything!

Here are pictures of Hannah's first day of school --

We had the greatest summer ever ...

just the three of us & I am so thankful.

Thankful for the peace we have had.

Thankful for the memories we have made.

It has been much needed time for us to be off schedule & just be together for summer travels & plans.

I am one incredibly blessed Mom!!

No complaints from Kentucky.

Ever.

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"I will extol the Lord at all times; his praise will always be on my lips." Psalm 34:1

"Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the desert ....

to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart." Deuteronomy 8:2

Still loving life in Idaho ..

2011-08-07T23:46:00.000-07:00

Lucky Peak Lake

August 7, 2011

Perfection.

Lily with "T" (Katie)

Good times with my BFF

Campfire bbq

Getting ready to go back across the lake to the truck

And then Uncle Kevin let Lily drive the boat ...

And WOW,

she loved it ..

And got revenge for all the times I have said:

"bedtime", "no" & "you are going to get a spanking"

Our lives flashed before our eyes!

It was surreal to be dragged around the lake by my three year old while trying to pull my best friend up from falling off the back of the tube.

Somehow we all hung on & lived to tell about it!

I have never laughed so hard in my life.

Good times.

Wonderful memories.

Beyond thankful to the Lord for this time with our Slazas family in Idaho!!

Good Times in Idaho

2011-08-01T13:11:00.000-07:00

We have been loving life in Idaho with Auntie Mom & Family.

Lily & Hannah are having the best time ever.

I'm taking a vacation from my problems, as Bob Wiley says.

Ha, ha!

Went boating ...

Went Fishing ...

Been Eating at Some Diner Drive In & Dive locations ..

To a swim meet weekend....

Saw Twin Falls ... Beautiful!

Just enjoying being together ...

Hate to think about these fun days together ever coming to an end.

We have just over a week left for more Idaho fun.

Last Post Before I.D.A.H.O.

2011-07-20T18:57:00.000-07:00

We have been counting the months ... counting the days .... counting the minutes .....

to go back to Auntie Mom's house in Idaho!

The time has finally come ...

we leave tomorrow!

This is summer.

Back on the boat.

Back with my BFF.

Back to laughing so hard that some in our party need dry pants.

Back to making the best of Summer memories ...

just how life should be.

------------------------------------------------------------------

Before we leave, here is a look at what we've been up to in Kentucky:

Hannah & her sweet friend, Meredith.

They swim for hours & have so much fun together!

Lily & Teagen ... fun times!

Lily & I in my friend's hot tub.

Good times in Kentucky!!

The girls & I are doing great.

Really.

This summer has been so wonderful for us.

Hannah's doctor emailed me from NIH

& her her bone marrow biopsy showed that her bone marrow

is working normally on a cellular level ...

Just a miracle after so many thousands of people prayed

that she would avoid a bone marrow transplant.

Thank you, Lord, for your goodness ...

& for the life that You breathed into Hannah's bone marrow!!!

Psalm 89:1

"I will sing of the Lord's great love forever;

with my mouth I will make your faithfulness known through all generations."

Proverbs 3:7 & 8

"Do not be wise in your own eyes; Fear the Lord and turn away from evil.

It will be healing to your body and refreshment to your bones."

All God's best from Kentucky,

T-Ball Girl

2011-07-14T10:51:00.000-07:00

She hits. She throws. She runs.

She goes after that ball with gusto like she goes after everything else in life.

She brings it & I love every minute of it!!

She even flirts with the opposing team.

Distraction:

it's a strategy I taught her.

Signed,

One Proud Momma.

Home from the East Coast

2011-07-10T11:13:00.000-07:00

It was a perfect trip to the East Coast.

Minus a stomach bug for all (except Lily) & a traffic jam on our last highway home.

Girls & I had such a nice time &

the trip was even sweeter since Blair joined us.

July 4th we met a family that I know from online for some local festivities ..

their 5 year old, Charlotte, has Aplastic Anemia so her Mom & I

have connected due to these unwanted circumstances for our kids.

It was so great to meet in person.

What a beautiful family & Charlotte is just darling!!

Hannah, Lily & Charlotte on the rides July 4th.

Guess, I should mention that I let the girls go crazy with the tattoos ...

Lily had 3 on her face & did not want to take them off for July 4th.

Attractive, huh?

The petting zoo ..

Me & Ellen with our kids.

Thankful for a normal day of our girls not needing blood transfusions ...

just celebrating life in America!

Italian water ice ....

And guess who learned how to be very comfortable in the pool????

LILY

Thanks to Aunt Rachel she made leaps & bounds with her confidence in the pool.

Thank you Rachel!!!!

Yes, the tattoo is still on her forehead ...

Rachel, Blair & I went out one night for dinner.

After 2 sips of her martini my sister was having a good time.

Oh Anthony's Pizza ... I love you!

Hannah & my dad before a ride on the scooter.

Good times with grandpa!

The girls with my parents ....

The night before we drove home, my parents took Rachel & I to Fleming's for dinner.

Oh yum.

Steak. Lobster. Baked Potato. Castle Rock.

Delicous!!

Thanks, Dad & Mom for having us & for making the trip so special.

Love you both so much!!

The girls & I are home for a bit so they can spend time with Jim before we leave for Idaho.

We CANNOT wait to get back out to Auntie Mom & Family ...

get in the boat, get on the lake & live it up before school starts.

I am so thankful to have this summer with the girls.

Things are much more settled & we are doing really well.

God has been faithful in every way & I truly am so grateful.

East Coast Extravaganza

2011-07-03T20:34:00.000-07:00

Thank goodness I have my Hannah back.

I was the first parent at the camp. No joke. I barely slept the night before .. I was DYING to go get my girl!!

Hannah had a great week at camp but was very very homesick.

Here she is with some of her fellow campers & counselors.

Less than 12 hours after picking up Hannah we high tailed it to the East Coast in my van with cousin Blair.

We got to Philly - caught up on sleep & made our way to NIH in Bethesda, Maryland for Hannah to have her routine follow up bone marrow biopsy. Hannah is such a champ & the whole thing doesn't worry her a bit.

Biopsy went great.

Her blood counts continue to do awesome & her doctors are so pleased with her tremendous progress.

Even though we were only at NIH for a few hours, of course, I took pictures.

Numbing cream for her arm before trying to get a line started.

Dressed for biopsy.

Thank you, Lord, that Nurse Debbie got the line started on the first try!!!

Grandma joined us for the fun!

This is Janet -- she has done every one of Hannah's biopsies at the NIH.

She is so sweet!

After the biopsy on the way back to the Day Hospital Hannah waved to everyone in the OR & in the hallway.

Dreaming of being in pageant one day!

Our Hero's: Dr. Neil Young & Dr. Phillip Scheinberg.

Hannah's doctors that we love & thank God for!!

Nurse Debbie ... so thankful for her kindness & for her being able to have Hannah as her patient on this day!

We love you, Debbie

After NIH we spent a few days Down the Shore in Ocean City, NJ with my wonderful family.

So great to be back at the beach .... something we don't get a lot of in Kentucky.

Obviously.

Nothing better than Summer.

We are so enjoying this time ... being off schedule & not having to set an alarm clock.

Making memories & treasuring our days.

Life is good!

Pathetic Mother

2011-06-23T20:16:00.000-07:00

I pick up Hannah tomorrow morning & I'll be the first parent there.

Might just leave tonight & sleep at the gate.

It is so pathetic.

She has only been gone since Monday & I miss her SO MUCH!!

I didn't think I'd miss her this much.

I thought I'd just love having one on one time with Lily ..

which I have .. don't get me wrong

but life isn't right without Hannah.

I am dying to see my girl & hear all about her time at camp!!

I think this camp thing is way harder on the parents!!!

Lily & I had a very mellow week .....

minus our time in the basement bathroom during tornado warnings.

Aaah, making good Kentucky memories!

This time I brought in a table & chair for her & my laptop so she could play computer games.

Maybe I am actually getting used to all of this crazy weather!

Here is a bit of my sweet Lily from this week .... enjoy!

Tornado warnings & chilling in the john.

Hair cut time ... just took off about an inch to clean things up.

How adorable is she??! Oh my goodness!

Besides my anti-biotics making me feel like I have morning sickness 24/7

- which is not humanly possible -

life is good!

The girls & I will drive on Saturday (12 hours) to see my family

& for Hannah to have a follow-up bone marrow biopsy at the NIH on Monday.

I will post Camp pictures once we get to the East Coast.

Cannot wait to see my Hannah ...

only 11 hours & 49 minutes!!!

All God's best,

Pathetic Mother of a First Time Camper

Hannah is at Camp

2011-06-21T09:28:00.000-07:00

The drop off went perfect.

Hannah & I enjoyed talking during the 3 hour drive & looking at everything on the beautiful back roads of Kentucky.

Lily enjoyed some movies in the back

& told me "I am being very patient, Mommy" -- she knew we were in for an entire day of driving!

Hannah was SO excited and SO nervous

but SO excited!!!

I think it helped that the girls & I had spent the weekend at this camp center back in March.

Hannah felt comfortable knowing where the dining hall is, where the craft lodge is, etc.

She led the way out of the van to the check in area.

Hannah is ready for some horse back riding ... and a week of fun, fun, fun!

Waiting with Lily for her physical exam at the Medical Center.

This place has a full medical center. Kids can get chemo during camp, if needed.

Blood pressure was a little high .. probably because she was so excited!!!

Everything checked out ... no lice, no fever ...

just a lot of excitement!!

Hannah didn't want to pose for any pictures so sorry no pictures of her adorable cabin & bed.

This is the absolute cleanest camp ever!

It is so perfect for all of these kids that have been through so much .. and many that are still going through so much!

After we gave quick hugs Lily & I wrote a message for Hannah to see when she leaves her cabin.

When we pulled up to the gate at the camp they directed us to the check in area & told us to get her medications out of her suitcase.

I told them that Hannah doesn't have any medications & we all cheered

and then I started crying.

It is just unreal to imagine how far Hannah has come since Summer 09.

Sometimes the emotions of her healing just pour out.

Thank you, Lord!!

Lily & I are off to the pool ... enjoying the good life of Summer 2011!!

Summer Fun

2011-06-18T21:29:00.000-07:00

I've got some crazy summer strep throat & pink eye in both my eyes.

I look like I have been hit by a very large truck.

It is not pretty!

Earlier this week, the girls & I went to a friend's house for a play date.

The girls had a great time playing while I got to visit with 2 nice moms

& enjoy some normal before my body decided to revolt & get sick!

Here are a bunch of pictures.

Enjoy!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hannah loves being "the teacher" ... Lily doesn't always love being "the student"

but on this day it went well.

For at least 5 minutes!

Hannah & her sweet friend, Meredith ...

they have such a blast together & actually posed for a picture!

The rest of the time they were doing this ...

dunking each other, going down the water slide & swimming for hours!!

Lily & her little friend, Teagen.

They are so cute together!!

Their backyard is like a park.

I had invited this mom to join us at the public pool, not knowing her house is a mini-resort.

No wonder she invited us to come play at her place instead!!

Lily's absolute favorite:

the tire swing.

And fun with sand ....

while holding a blanket & "baby".

Gotta love life for these precious 3 year olds!!

We are truly enjoying this summer.

I am so thankful for some fun time here in Kentucky.

In the next few weeks we start our summer travel plans.

Hannah leaves for sleep away camp on Monday.

She will be gone for the week at this amazing place!!

It is a week for kids with Hematology / Oncology issues.

I am excited for her to meet other kids that have experienced similar

trauma & be able to have a wonderful camp experience.

Please pray she does well being away from home!

All God's Best from HOME,

My Sister

2011-06-09T17:17:00.000-07:00

I had a wonderful childhood.

Worse thing: I had to eat peas.

I still hate them.

My sister, Miriam, lives 2 hours up the road.

Major bonus after moving across the country from Califronia.

Miriam is the most organized person you could ever meet.

She makes Martha Stewart look like a slob & a hoarder.

I love her & thank God for our friendship ....

it is more than I ever dreamed it would be

when we were teenagers fighting over clothes.

She is an incredible blessing to me.

To our family. To her family.

Last weekend the girls & I went to Miriam's place in Indiana

& had a wonderful time just hanging out.

Of course, my camera was out taking pictures

....in manual mode (eek!).

These photos are far from perfect but great memories.

Good thing I am not a perfectionist

with my camera.... or anything.

My girls love these cousins!!

Enjoy a look at our time with "The Three J's"

I love you, Miriam --

thanks for a wonderful time together

& for letting me snap pictures the entire time.

All God's best from HOME in Kentucky,

Three Years & Never Forgotten

2011-06-07T20:39:00.000-07:00

Three years.

Went so fast. Went so slow.

It is just hard to believe Roisin has been gone three years.

This photo was taken of Roisin & I on September 15, 2007.....

and that is Jane, her youngest, behind us playing with our hair.

I love that I have this photo ...

this memory of being with Roisin at Bridget's soccer game ...

living life as normal Moms to healthy kids & just being great friends

on what turned out to be an incredibly important day in my life:

The day Lily was being born somewhere in China.

September 15, 2007

Roisin was a great friend.

To everyone.

She was so fun.

You would never know that on this day she was in a lot of pain.

A lot. A lot.

A lot of pain.

but she wanted to have a good time with her girls on the lake

& be the fun Mom that she ALWAYS was.

She made the best of it all ... even when she was dealing with chemo side effects.

She made us laugh .. short sheeting beds on our girls weekend away,
putting undergarments over clothes

& pretending to smoke pot with one of my tea bags.

Wonderful Irish wit!!!!

She loved my sister, Rachel ...and connected with her as a treasured friend.

Roisin was selfless, kind, fun, easy going, understanding, caring, empathetic

& kind ... did I mention kind??

She was just the kindest soul.

But above all ...
Roisin was a wonderful Mother.

She took care of her three beauties
& made her house the "hang out house" for their friends.

This is Danielle ... now about to be a Senior in High School.

I have a message saved on my phone when

Roisin thanked me "for taking care of my Danielle"

on a trip Danielle & I took together to the East Coast.

This is HER Danielle.

Always & Forever.

And fun, fun Bridget ... going into 10th grade.

She has the same micheveous sparkle in her eye that Roisin had.

I love it!!

This is HER Bridget.

Always & forever.

I remember snapping this picture in July 2006 &

praying that Roisin would be there for many birthdays to come.

This is HER Jane.

Always & forever.

Now Roisin is in a place she wants all of us to know about ...

she is with the Lord in a real place ...
Heaven.

She is more alive today than she ever was here on Earth.

Each of our days are numbered.

None of us know which will be our last breath.

Take pictures. Make memories. Cherish the moments.

Most of all, be prepared for Eternity.

All of us have a pre-set appointment to meet the Creator of the Universe.

and He loves us so much & wants us to know Him!

To know His peace during times of struggle.
To know His forgiveness.
To be enveloped in His love.

To experience His joy.

To walk in His grace ..His Amazing Grace.

I am so thankful for the peace of knowing that Roisin
is without pain in a wonderful place where I will see her again one day.

Selfishly, of course, I wish she was here.
For her girls. For her friends. For her family.

She will never be forgotten.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"For God

SO LOVED

the world that

HE GAVE HIS ONLY SON,

that whoever believes in Him

SHALL HAVE ETERNAL LIFE."

- John 3:16

"And the testimony is this,

that God has given us

ETERNAL LIFE,

and this life is in His Son."

- 1 John 5:11

The Summer Party Has Started

2011-06-04T19:27:00.000-07:00

Hannah's last day of 3rd Grade was on Thursday at noon.

What a victory!!

Her first FULL YEAR of school since Kindergarten.

Thank you, Lord!!!!

For the past 7 weeks ALL Hannah has been able to think about is the

Day Camp she had planned for some 3 & 4 year olds.

Really.

All she could think about.

All she wanted to talk about

.... for hours on end.

There was a written schedule.

Signs.

Typed invitations to the parents.

She, of course, was the Camp Director.

I was just the lowly Assistant.

She had all the kids holding a jump rope walking to the backyard.

One of the older siblings stayed & was a huge help (seen here bringing up the rear of the line!).

This is Will from six houses down. Adopted from China. Same age as Lily.

All the kids except Lily ... she was too busy to get in the picture!

Baking cookies.

This is Teegan, from China, same age as Lily.

How cool is that?

Then Hannah & Meredith decided to have a full on water fight ...

These camp leaders went crazy!

Trying to take a group picture.

Just call it Camp Shanghai ... 75% of the camp was born in China.

Lily being a nut!!!!! Love her!

And also this summer ...

Lily is playing T ball!!!!!

So cute!!!

Here is Lily practicing her swing with the Coach.

And the swing ....

And the hit!!!

Run, Lily, Run ...

Getting to First!!!

Touching the bag ... and holding her massively too large helmet!!

And, last but not least ..

if you need us ...

We will be at THE POOL!!!!!!!

Having a good time ... making Summer Memories!!!

Filling buckets ...

Putting our toes in the water ...

And I just couldn't resist this adorable summer photo ....

How cute is she!!!!!

She checked out the big kids tube ...

And of course made it all a party .. that's what life is for this girl!!

Just about every minute is all good ..... when you are Lily!

Unless it is the first day at the pool & Mommy forgot to bring "Baby" into the pool area.

Good thing "Baby" was just in the car.....

These tears didn't last long.

But I did snap a picture ....

Sorry, Auntie Mom!!

We are already in Full Summer Swing ...

excited for Hannah to be off & the schedule to be relaxed!!

All God's best from HOME,

Looking Back ...

2011-05-31T08:17:00.000-07:00

It has been a year since I was in my van with my sweet dog, Joy, driving to Kentucky.

Just the 2 of us.

Chilling with the 80's music, Shania Twain and Jeremy Camp.

So many things are not as I thought they would be at this point

but I have to say ...

THANK YOU, LORD that none of life is a surprise to Him & I am thankful each day for His Grace.

Every day is a gift.

I Remember how incredibly sick Hannah was in July 2009

with bi-lateral pneumonia & a temperature of 107.

I am thankful for each & every day I have with my precious oldest daughter ...

She is healthy enough to play soccer ..

to love on her little sister & watch out for her when I cannot ....

to ride the school bus each day ...

and to enjoy normal life with a 3rd grade teacher

& friends ....

Hannah has her life & I don't take a moment of it for granted.

Life is good.

I remember how L.O.N.G. I waited to see Lily's face.

3 1/2 years of waiting for China to process the paperwork.

The Lord used that wait to teach me to trust in Him with all my heart ...

a lesson I will never be done learning.

I wondered for 3 1/2 years what Lily looked like ...

And then I finally saw her face on August 11, 2008 ...

Her beautiful, happy, joyful face that brought sunshine all the way from China.

How happy my heart is to be mom to this girl that loves life.

She is a love bug & a gem

She is a delight ... in the morning

and at night

She is so strong willed at times ...

But she is mine.
All mine.

Life really is good.

Things may not be what I imagined

but God's faithfulness has not changed

& it is His love that sustains me each day.

All God's best from HOME in KY,

Lily Day

2011-05-25T19:28:00.000-07:00

Today was just an easy day with miss Lily.

Hannah has a week left of school so today was one of the last times that I will be alone with Lily until August.

We started with breakfast in my bed. Bagels & cream cheese .... only Lil decided to just smear the cream cheese all over her lips / face.

So, of course, I grabbed my camera to document the craziness.

I love it!

We went to Meijer so she could ride Sandy FIVE TIMES before we even shopped at the store.

Five times. Before the shopping part. You'd have thought I gave her the world. At one cent per ride, the world is affordable.

And for the Fashion Police (T) .. Lily put on this outfit today. I didn't have the heart to make her change her clothes. She swore it matched. Apparently I have some more training about matching patterns not just colors ... there is blue in the shirt & pants :-)!

Her good friend from pre-school came over for dinner. Very fun for these girls to be together outside of school. They picked at their dinners. Drank their milk. Jumped on the trampoline. And got soaked in the creek. It was a good time for all.

After they ran back up to the house to get warm they put on matching dresses & bows and

promised to wear these outfits tomorrow so they can be "twins" at school.

Adorableness.

Warm weather is here & we are enjoying the good life in Kentucky!

Truly.

Manual Mode with My Camera

2011-05-22T09:27:00.000-07:00

I am taking a photography class -- learning the Manual Mode of my camera.

It is overwhelming after being in the AUTO zone of my camera for years but it has also been fun to just learn something new!

Despite not knowing what I am doing, I have jumped in the deep end & been clicking away at my girls.

Here are a few pictures from this week ... all in Manual Mode:

Where Have The Days Gone?

2011-05-20T13:46:00.000-07:00

Time just seems to fly by ... can't believe that June is coming fast!!

We are counting the days to summer 2011!! Hannah has 2 weeks left of school ... thanks to snow days.

Last weekend was Blair's college graduation in Indianapolis.

For those of you that don't know, Blair is my Cousin Extraordinaire.

She has saved the day on many occassions (flying with the girls last year so they didn't have to drive to Kentucky & being with me on the East Coast for part of Summer 2009 when Hannah was sick) and is a dear friend to all.

What a blessing Blair's life is & I am so proud of her!

Here are some pictures from my weekend with the girls in Indianapolis:

WAY TO GO, BLAIR!!! YOU WILL BE THE BEST TEACHER EVER!!!

Blair & her best friend, Laura!

It was sort of like a mini-family reunion at Blair's graduation party

because both of my sisters were there & our kids (except one!).

It was a Cousins Unite Party.

Cousins: Sarah (17... Happy Birthday, pretty girl!!!), Hannah, Lily & Julia

Cousins: Justin & David

My sisters & I at the "Blairtini" party

Hannah & Cousin Justin

My 14 year old nephew, David ....

He's a wrestler, an A Student & one Super Sweet Guy!

I was holding his Mom's hand when he came into this world ... where have the years gone??

My cousins: Blair, Christine & Lindsey.

Great to see you guys!!

Have another "Blairtini" for me.

Cheers!! :-)

Life is good & I am thankful to the Lord each day for the health of my girls!

No complaints from Kentucky.

All God's Best from HOME,

Mother's Day

2011-05-09T20:26:00.000-07:00

Mother's Day was PERFECT.

I couldn't have asked for anything more!

There are some beautiful parks along the Ohio River so we went for a bike ride along the river.

While we were riding on the trail I kept ringing the bell on my bike (yes, I have a bell on my bike. I'm 6.) to warn all the "people" up ahead that we were coming through. Hannah & I were cracking up because there was NO ONE up ahead. The path was empty.

Just one more reason that I truly love living in Kentucky: no crowds at all.

Life is so much calmer & without a lot of the stress of Southern California.

Lily loves that she still fits in the baby seat on my bike.

She sat right behind me on my ride holding her "baby", of course, while Hannah & I rode our bikes.

This was my 10th year celebrating Mother's Day (well, as a Mom, that is) & it just gets better!

Lily indulged me with a mini photo shoot in our backyard and I was able to get some good shots of her. Amazing because I was totally out of my comfort zone selecting the aperture & the ISO ... the camera automatically selected the shutter speed.

This first picture is my absolute favorite from our shoot.

This one is going in a frame this week!

Look at her face!

Hannah was sitting by the creek writing songs while I took Lily's pictures.

After we were done, Hannah indulged me by getting in a few shots

& I was even able to set up the tripod to get the one of the three of us.

I love pictures and I couldn't ask for a better Mother's Day gift

than these reminders of such a great weekend with my girls.

And wow, the power of a few doses of anti-biotics -- Hannah was totally back to herself by Sunday.

So glad she is feeling better!!

I have so much to be thankful for!

Kentucky Derby ... From Home!

2011-05-07T22:06:00.000-07:00

Hannah was off from school on Friday but

woke up with both eyes stuck closed & pink eye in both eyes.

On top of that, she didn't feel well so off we went to the doctor's office.

The doctor took one look at Hannah & declared "you win the sickest patient of the day award." Hannah has a double ear infection (again!) and tonsillitis plus pink eye. The pink eye looks a ton better today just from having eye drops a few times.

Needless to say, we couldn't go to the Kentucky Derby at Churchill Downs today ...

Big Time Bummer!!!

I called to say we wouldn't be able to use the tickets (and to get them back before the race!). The group that donated the tickets to Hannah have been so kind to let her know that anytime she wants to come to Churchill Downs to see the backside of the track & pet the horses, just let them know.

How nice is that?

Well, sick or not, we enjoyed Derby day from here at home in between napping & eating!

and then we curled Hannah's hair ...

Lily said to me a few times in the morning as we were watching the pre-race stuff, "but I don't have a Derby hat!"

I had not bought a hat for Lily since she wasn't coming with us to Churchill Downs - she was going to be at her friends house down the street & I really hadn't planned for a hat for her.

So, not wanting Lily to miss any of our fun -- I did what all moms with a glue gun would do, I made her a hat. A little construction paper, feathers & paper flowers and we're "off to the races!!"

And then I got dressed as if I was still going to Churchill Downs.

Just for fun to take pictures from our deck.

We love living in Louisville, Kentucky & the town is on fire right now with excitement for Derby time.

It's a great time to be living in Kentucky. Sick or not. We wouldn't trade being here for anything!!

God has been so good to us and I am so thankful for the normal of going to the doctor & coming home with eye drops & an anti-biotic.

I know how different things could be & I never take any of this "normal life outside a hospital unit" for granted.

Camera Fun

2011-05-05T15:28:00.000-07:00

I am about to start a digital photography class taught by Lisa from thelongroadtochina.blogspot.com

I've been stuck for years in the AUTO zone with my DLSR Camera so I am looking forward to finally learning about aperture, shutter speeds, F-Stop & more!

We got notes from Lisa for our first week's class & last night I started playing around with some of the functions on my camera (baby steps, baby steps, baby steps).

None of these pictures are amazing ... just me learning & playing with the camera while Lily was having fun at the park. Then again, they are all pictures of Lily so they are amazing simply because of the subject matter!

I have A LOT to learn in the world of photography. I know the class will all be fun and I will be able to capture my two girls in new ways from behind the camera!

---------------------------------------------------

Only 37 hours until The 137th Kentucky Derby!!!

Hannah is off from school tomorrow in celebration of Derby weekend.

That's a sure sign that you live in KY.

Wow.

Our Tornadoes ....

2011-05-01T18:00:00.000-07:00

Tornadoes have been all over the South & last week's destruction was just unreal.

If you saw it on the news, you probably can't believe the devastation, the trauma & what it was like to be there. Unless you were on the ground experiencing it, you have no idea what it was REALLY like in the middle of those tornadoes.

Personally, the month of April was one tornado after the next:

Many were real tornado wanings here in in our Kentucky county

while others have been symbolic tornadoes

from trying to deal reasonably

with an unreasonable person.

Maybe it's just me

but I believe that NO ONE can ever know what is REALLY

going on in a marriage except for the two people

that are in that marriage.

It's just that way.

Unless you are the man or the wife:

you REALLY don't know.

You may think you know.

You might think you are the expert because

you have known so & so for SOOOO long ...

and so & so can quote theology left & right

but guess what?

Only the two people in that marriage KNOW for real what has been going on

& what kind of tornado warnings

they have been living under & for how long.

So while the South has been blown over with storm after storm

so has my life and the lives of my girls.

It's been c.r.a.z.y.

You just can't believe it unless you are here walking in our shoes

dodging storm after storm.

None of the details will ever make this blog,

but the personal tornadoes we are having to endure OVER & OVER

are beyond belief.

All I can do is be as much of shield as possible for my girls.

Both of them have already been through so much in their short lives:

THEY DO NOT DESERVE THIS!!

------------------------------------------------------

"Let us not love with word or with tongue, but in deed and truth."

1 John 3:18

Playing Catch Up .... Blog Style

2011-04-25T13:36:00.000-07:00

The past week or so has been crazy busy. Passover. Easter. Soccer. School Field Trips. You Name It. Rain Storms. Tornado Warning Sirens with some time in my bathtub fully dressed at 1am.

Rather than bore everyone with the details and some facts that no one would believe, here is a pictorial overview:

Girls in Kentucky

School Trip with Lily to the Zoo -- I live for this -- even if I only slept 2 hours the night before!

We rode the bus together ... and Lily packed paper & markers

so she'd have something to do on the ride.

Hilarious! Busy. Busy. Busy.

I got to spend some time visiting Hannah's classroom & having lunch with her friends.

Friends from Hannah's class at lunch. Such nice girls!!!

Hannah was voted as STAR STUDENT AGAIN!!

Her THIRD time.

It's a hat trick for my third grader!

I did a mini Passover Seder at home with the girls.

Hannah LOVED it. Lily not so much.

The favorite part was pretending the grape juice was real wine.

Hannah is making her fingers like "21"to show she is legal for the "wine".

Dye eggs & a mini seder on the same night.

Really, girls, you CAN have it all. :-)

If we are going to do it all, why not do it all at the SAME time?

Hannah is LOVING Spring Soccer.

So fun for her & her team is undefeated ... again!!

She is wearing my sneakers ... the girl & I are the same shoe size.

How did this happen? Didn't I just give birth???

Ever heard of the Kentucky Derby???

Hannah was given 2 tickets as a special gift for all she went through while she was sick.

My friend, Brigitte Toth, in Palm Springs worked her connections to get Hannah invited.

We feel like real Kentucky folks getting ready for the Derby ....

Brigitte, I am still in shock ... THANK YOU!!!

More posts & more pictures to come soon.

All God's best from HOME in KY,

But It Looked So Big at the Store ....

2011-04-16T19:42:00.000-07:00

This bag of mulch ... it looked HUGE.

It is huge. Who is kidding who?

That thing should cover Soldier Field.

NOPE.

That bag covered 1 square inch.

Good thing I bought three bags ...

just in case.

The manufacturers of mulch are laughing at me right now. I can hear them.

The kids were excited to mulch. They were. Really.

"To what?"

That's right, kids, the gardener is no longer in the budget.

It's just us ...

so get busy.

Away we went putting those three bags of mulch out.

On 3 square inches in the planter.

12 bags & 2 more trips to Lowe's later ... we have completed one side of front of the house.

I am making my last trip so we can hopefully finish the other side of the front of the house ...

because this side of the house

no look pretty!!!

Spring is here & the mulching has been therapy.

Despite our current challenges ...

we've been through worse.

"Give thanks in all circumstances .... " 1 Thess. 5:18a

All God's best from HOME,

This & That ...

2011-04-13T20:15:00.000-07:00

* Sick, again!

This is officially the sixth or seventh time Hannah has been sick this Winter / Spring. All three of us have bronchitis & Hannah has been cranking the fevers around 103 for part of this week. Unreal. It's not Aplastic Anemia & it could be a million times worse but I realize why I get n.o.t.h.i.n.g done ... I have been a full time nurse since around November. On top of already being the Full-time Everything, just add in nurse & call it a day.

* Visitors to Kentucky

Jhan & Melissa were in town

They are dear friends from when I lived in Chicago (1994/95)-- I lived in their basement for a summer with my college roommate. We made a mess. Lived there for three months and trashed the place like 2 middle school girls. I think the gift we gave Melissa was a cookbook for all her troubles. I can't imagine. She must have wanted to kill us. Thanks, Melissa ... I really don't know if I'd have the patience or the sense of humor that you had while we trashed your basement. While they were here they met my kids, encouraged my heart & took me out to the most amazing dinner I have had in a decade. Thanks, Melissa & Jhan!!!

Phyllis came to town ...

Phyllis went to nursing school with my mom & was instrumental in leading my mom to Christ. She came to town for a conference & came a day early to see me & see the girls.

She is an ENERGY force but even she had a hard time talking over Miss Lily. (No joke, Jane!!) The kids had never met Phyllis but after telling her what a good friend she is to Grandma they felt like my mom's sister was coming to stay the night. It was instant friendship & an instant audience ...Hannah's guitar was out in no time!!! We talked, laughed & stayed up way too late. I am so thankful for her encouragement, kindness & understanding. What a gift.

* On the Phone ....

For all of 10 minutes.

I swear.

This child knows that when a phone is attached to my ear she can get busy with what she shouldn't be doing.

Her arms looked like leprosy for days.

* Back to School ...

Hannah loved Spring Break but was also super excited to go back to school this past Monday (of course, she's been home ever since with cough & fever... and will be home til Friday, thanks to orders from Dr. M.).

Waiting for the bus ... happy days!!!!

And last but not least ....

* One Guinea Pig ...

Over Spring Break we were asked to pet sit a guinea pig for a friend of Hannah's from Girl Scouts. Sounded easy enough to me. We wouldn't even have to clean out the cage since the family would only be gone one week. This family also moved from California last summer & apparently the family guinea pig came on a separate flight for the cost of about $1,000. So needless to say, Coconut, was no ordinary guinea pig, she was (emphasis on WAS) a BELOVED GUINEA PIG. My girls were LOVING her. They couldn't get enough of her. Holding her ALL the time. Never putting her down & giving her attention & love galore.

The second night that Coconut was here I was in the bathtub across the hall from Hannah's room. I could hear Hannah & Lily talking to Coconut. They were fine -- happy as could be loving on Coconut. I was thinking that I have to get the girls a guinea pig because they love having her. Well, I get out of the tub & stop in the room -- "how's Coconut?", I say. "oh good, she's sleeping". Humm ... I think ... sleeping? sleeping with her eyes wide open & laying on her side???? "Hannah, is she dead?" "No, mom, she's sleeping." "Hannah, she's dead. ... she's not moving. ... do guinea pigs sleep with their eyes open!" Oh my goodness!!!!!! Yes, dead. I thought maybe she was just playing dead like an opossum but Coconut don't play dead. Maybe we killed her with kindness? Apparently guinea pigs can die suddenly or, as my Uncle Eddie said, this one did.

RIP Coconut ... We are so sorry!!!

It was horrible but the family was very kind about the whole thing. Maybe next year they will enjoy a Stay-cation like the rest of us normal folks.

All God's best from the Great State of Kentucky,

Photo Shoot

2011-04-06T01:40:00.000-07:00

My cousin Blair is here!!

She is wonderful, helpful, kind, understanding, fun, caring & the girls L.O.V.E her. Basically she is perfect. And that is what I demand. Ya'll know me .... wink-wink.

She came down for a few days & this is Hannah's Spring Break week. We are having a great time staying up way too late & laughing our pants off (no explanation necessary).

Blair is about to graduate from college so we did a photo shoot for her graduation announcements. Her pictures came out amazing & we created a custom announcement.   I can't post the announcement but it looks so good & so professional.   I am just happy that Blair loves how it all turned out!

I am so glad to have my nice camera back!!!!!   At one location we took a few pictures of the girls & I.   The weather is awesome & Spring soccer season is here so I am sure we will be having a lot of photo opportunities in the weeks to come.

Here are just a few of the pictures from today.

Look at my gorgeous cousin .... I feel so privileged that she asked me to take her pictures!!

Actually, Hannah took this picture of Blair.

Go, Hannah & Wow, Blair!

Taking the next road in life!

Beautiful! We love you, Blair!

Congratulations!!

Us Girls and of course, "baby", who is always with Lily.

Yes, my hair is super dark. It's called Nice & Easy Foam, people. Cheap, do it myself & voila, no more gray (except for those dang temple hairs!). Too dark right now is better than too gray. Think I will hire myself again in the very near future!

I told Lily to look, a cow was coming (and, well, that I love her & would lay my life down for her in an instant. It was a tender moment.)

But the cow thing just cracked Hannah up and made Lily look for a cow ....

but turns out something else was coming ... ...

Our dog had jumped out of the van for a potty break. Oh my.

Fun times.

I am so thankful for this week that Hannah is off from school. It is so nice to not have to set that stupid alarm. We are just kicking back, totally off schedule & enjoying being together.

I am starting to get excited for summer break ... coming soon!!!

All God's best from KY,

Camp for Courageous Kids

2011-04-03T11:22:00.000-07:00

Last weekend Hannah, Lily & I went to Southern Kentucky for a retreat at Camp for Courageous Kids. It is an amazing place that has camping adventures for ill children & we were blessed to be included for an awesome weekend!!!

Such a FUN weekend. Well, it started off a bit longer than we expected because there was construction on the highway & we ended up in massive traffic (which virtually doesn't exist in KY). Once we got off the highway & onto the back roads it was a gorgeous drive ... rolling hills, horses, cows, farms galore & just so beautiful. What a state we live in .. I love it here!!!

Here are pictures from our weekend -- my camera is back from the shop & I could not be happier to be taking pictures of my two darlings.

We had a great weekend. Hannah was on fire dancing all weekend & making friends with other kids. When the dance music comes on she comes alive & shows a side of herself that few get to see.

What a treasures my girls are & how blessed I am ... even in the midst of one of the worst times of my life.

Lily took this picture of Hannah .. dancing it up with the staff & the other kids.

Dancing after every meal ... Hannah & our counselor, Katie. (T - you'll love to know that Lily declared "T" & "Katie" go together, they sound alike)

Hannah & her doctor dancing it up in the cafeteria area

Craft time ... the craft area was AMAZING.

Girls making a craft together.

Look, Mom, I made a microphone!!!

Beading with Katie, our counselor / helper for the weekend.

While Lily & I took a nap on Saturday, Hannah went to the beauty shop..... oh my!!!

Hannah did Katie's make up & hair ... hilarious!

Girls working the moves after dinner near the fire place.

Lily is now posing in Hannah's "signature move"

Love this prescription!!!!!!!

This place is life changing ...

So glad to have my nice camera fixed .. it is able to catch fun moments like this.

Thank you, Lord, for my sweet Hannah!!!

A really good time to get away for the weekend & just be together!!!

All God's best from Kentucky,

Scrapbooking

2011-03-24T16:57:00.000-07:00

Last weekend I had some fun doing digital scrapbooking. It was so good to get some more pages done for the girls!

I create all of these pages through a digital scrapbook program called Storybook Creator. It is available through my friend's website: www.mycmpage.com/kgoodman I then buy digital "papers & embellishments" through her site. The program is easy to use & makes doing scrapbooking a lot less time consuming. There are many pre-designed pages that you can use so all you have to do is drag & drop your pictures onto the pages (love that!!!).

I save each scrapbook page as a JPEG & then print them in size 8:x8" at Costco.com or Simplyscrapping.com. If I am in a rush I use Costco but if I have more time I print them online at Simplyscrapping.com because it is cheaper & I think the quality is better than Costco (if that is possible).

I have an 8x8 album for each of the girls that I fill with these printed pages as I am able to do them.

Here are a some of the pages I finished last weekend ... Enjoy!!

Fun times.

Life is good.

Many more wonderful memories to come ... stay tuned!!

This is the Day the Lord has Made ....

2011-03-19T13:35:00.000-07:00

Friday was supposed to be school for Lily & a meeting for me but she just wanted her Mommy .... so I changed the plans.

At first I thought "great, Lil, we can go run some errands together" ... but that wouldn't be much fun.

Instead we had a Mother / Daughter day -- complete with a trip to the zoo, ice cream at Dairy Queen, games & time on the swing.

It was what Lily needed and the time with her was therapy for my soul!!!

As she was on the swing she was singing very loudly "This is the day the Lord has made" (emphasis on VERY loudly!!!!).

All of Kentucky got the message and yes, Lily, it is!!

The girls & I have been singing that song a lot (and we've been singing "I'm a little tea pot" but that's for a different post)

Those words are just a good reminder that no matter what is going on, no matter what disappointments we face --- each day is a made by the Lord & He has good gifts to give!!

I am forever thankful for the gift of Lily -- she brings me endless joy & such happiness!

Here are some pictures of our day -- my camera is still not fixed so these are all from my phone. I HATE that I don't have my nice camera right now but at least I was able to capture the fun of our day together.

Swinging in the backyard -- she would live in this seat if I'd let her! No shoes - weather was nice & I just carried her down to the swing.

Playing Candy Land in the basement. She won. I hope that is no surprise :-)

At the zoo!!! "Look, Mom!!!"

This guy was hysterical -- we hung out here for a long time. He put on a real show for everyone!

Notice that Lily is holding "Baby". Baby comes everywhere with us. I have to order another back up from Targ*t.com

Tuna fish sandwiches for lunch on a bench & just being together.

And, yes, this hat is cemented to my head!!

Last Wednesday when I came into my Bible Study (BSF) group I didn't have a hat on

& my leader said "Oh my goodness -- you have hair!!"

It's true -- I love my 3 hats :-)

Finished up the zoo with a ride on the carousel. A great time delighting in my sweet girl as she checked it all out & tried to figure out how that horse went up & down.

Ice Cream at DQ before getting home to meet Hannah at the bus stop (our driveway!).

"This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice & be glad in it." Psalm 118:24

God is so good.

He always gives good gifts.

Life is filled with so much pain

but no matter what you are going through

this is the day the Lord has made

& he wants you to know His tremendous love!

Bragging On Hannah

2011-03-13T11:43:00.000-07:00

If you are a long time reader, you know that Hannah has been through more than any child should ever have to endure.

At this point, Hannah is one year back at school & back to "normal" life...and I have a lot of bragging to do.

Hannah is absolutely loving 3rd grade! After missing a year & a half of school she is right on track & in the upper half of her class. The kids in her class are very kind to her & respect her. I am just amazed at the caring relationships she has developed & the way the kids treat her.

On Friday, the teacher was announcing the "Star Student" for this coming Monday (Star Student gets to sit on the couch all day in class with shoes off & relax while learning!). Miss W. was scanning all the kids sitting on the carpet saying "Let me see? who has been a great example today? Who have I not had to talk to about anything today?...." All the kids, started shouting "It's Hannah! It's Hannah!" And, yes, it was Hannah! Hannah was OVER THE MOON to be the star student!

I am proud of her for being a role model to the kids but mostly for her kindness to others. There is a girl in her class with a lot of emotional issues & Hannah continues to reach out to her & "try to help her when she is having a hard time." What more could I ask for? I am glad she is getting good grades but mostly I am proud of her kindness & caring attitude towards others.

Over the past five months Hannah has been a part of an amazing program through the University of Louisville Medical Center called "Healthy for Life." This program has been helping her get more healthy after all the weight she gained from steroids, medicines & sitting around waiting for her bone marrow to come home. I am so proud of her! Recently, we had a follow-up appointment with the director & she was praising Hannah up & down for doing in 4 months what most patients do in 6.

The program recently added acupuncture. The director felt the acupuncture would help rid Hannah's body of the toxins from all the medicines she took while she was so sick. Hannah has had two treatments and loved it! The acupuncture is done by a Pediatric ICU doctor that also specializes in Japanese acupuncture. I don't know many 9 year old children that will allow a doctor to put needles all over their body but Hannah did it without any problem. She didn't complain or fuss & told him she liked it! Amazing.

As part of this program, the State of Kentucky offers a 6 month membership to the YMCA for free. Hannah is now a champ on the elliptical, the treadmill & enjoying the swimming pool.

Hannah is a joy to have around. The past week she has been out of school with a stomach flu (yes, another illness!!). Even when she was feeling her worst, she was still happy & easy going. What a treasure!

Here are some pictures from my phone from the past few weeks ---

At the dentist for a cleaning ... no cavities (or "magets" as Lily calls them).

The day after we got home from China, Hannah took Lily in her car seat to "play school." Let's just say it didn't go as Hannah had planned. Lily was 1. Lily had jet lag. Lily didn't speak English. These days Hannah thinks she has died & gone to heaven because finally Lily has come around to the fact that Hannah is the teacher, Lily is the student. Most days it goes well. Here are the girls in the basement playing -- Hannah is sitting in "Lily's desk" grading her paper. I think Hannah had been teaching her fractions. Maybe she can teach me.

Last weekend Hannah got a guitar. Now we just need some lessons to go with it. She has been strumming away all week. Having fun & writing more songs in her notebook. Adorable.

The other day she told me she is 1/2 way to 18.

Just stop the clocks right now!

Last but not least, the love she has for Lily is precious. I love their tender relationship -- which of course has its moments but truly Hannah takes care of Lily. Looks out for her. Comforts her. Makes sure she knows what is going on. On this night Lily was asleep in my bed and Hannah was loving on her baby sister before she went off to bed in her own bunk.

Since the time I was five I wanted to be a mom. Hannah made my dream come true and she makes my "job" very easy.

I could not imagine life without her ... and never want to!

Thank you, Lord, for the gift of Hannah -- for your healing hand on her life & the joy you place in her heart!

I am a blessed mom and so proud of the sweet 9 year old girl that I get to share this life with!

All God's best from HOME,

Love Me A Road Trip

2011-03-01T22:35:00.000-08:00

The girls & I were in need of some change of scenery .... so off we went to Nashville, TN for the weekend.

Just us and Cupcake, too!

We ate amazing food -- thanks to Monell's -- where the food just keeps coming & the Southern hospitality is alive & well. Breakfast was family style (read: sit with people you don't know & the kitchen just starts sending out the food!!). Pancakes, sausage, best bacon ever, fried chicken (yes @ breakfast!), biscuits ... and on & on.

The food was endless & I felt like we had Thanksgiving dinner with strangers at 10AM on a Saturday in February. I highly recommend it. Glad I packed my yoga pants.

We went to the Science Center .. forgot that the earth spins at 1,040 miles per hour (no wonder I feel dizzy). Good to be reminded of that & many other facts that I will easily forget.

Hannah now calls the town "My Nashville". I love that it is now her Nashville after just 48 hours. Adorable. She even wrote a song about the place.

Did I mention that Hannah has a notebook filling up with songs? She tells me she has a performance planned with all the songs for the next time we get to Idaho. She wants a crowd that cheers. I can't say that I blame her.

Breakfast @ Monell's

Lily owns the camera ...and she'll use it!

Her view of our table.

Happy Thanksgiving .... in February!

Not a happy camper. Can't you tell?

"Cheers, Lil" with the sweet tea that flowed like the Cumberland River. What a country!

Heaven will for sure have a place like this!

Science Center .. Hannah's favorite part.... or parts. No pun intended.

Ice cream at Mike's on Broadway. Red Velvet cake ice cream. Chunks of real red velvet cake in the ice cream. I died in this place.

Hatch Show Print Shop ... historic place in Nashville. Not of interest to Lily but the cat sure was.

And last but not least:

Lily on Broadway Street in the downtown.

I love how she is rocking the boot with her "Baby" in hand.

That's my girl!!

Living in Kentucky is so different than Southern California.

No Disneyland passes here.

It's fried chicken & a road trip.

I love it!!

All God's best from HOME in KY,

Weekly Update ...

2011-02-21T21:48:00.000-08:00

Life is good.

I haven't cried today.

Or yesterday.

Or did I?

Oh, shoot, I did cry yesterday.

Dang it.

I thought it had been a whole 48 hours.

Well, at least 24 hours ... that's pretty good?

Don't get me wrong -- I am not walking around with a box of tissues strapped to my body. The girls & I have a very happy life -- but when I get in the tub or I am driving in my car alone -- I cry.

The tears find a way out.

Betrayal hurts.

Period.

This past week was many things but a few were: heart shaped pancakes for breakfast, beautiful dozen roses from my parents, a visit to the park, after school snacks outside on the deck, Valentine's day party at Hannah's school, an amazing well check up for Hannah and two play dates for her in one day.

Lily is just LOVING her pre-school and she is so super busy all the time that it makes me LOVE her pre-school! All you Moms know what I am talking about. Don't act like you don't :-)

Lily has been quoting from the movie "What About Bob?" and it is absolutely hysterical. The other morning she got on my bed to wake me up & was pushing on me saying "Wake up, Bob. Wake up. Rise & Shine, Bob. Cock a doodle doo!!!!"   How can the day not be good when your 3 year old wakes you up like that?

Typical, today we were back at the doctor's office for Hannah ... another ear infection! The doctor said many kids have been in with 3rd or 4th infections this year. They took a few drops of blood just to check her numbers & everything was NORMAL. Her platelets were even up from the last time --- really good since they had been trending downward the last few times.

My nice DSLR camera is still broken. Hoping it will be fixed soon. Taking pictures of the girls is so fun for me & I can't wait for our next photo shoot. For now, I snap away with Lily's little camera or my phone. The nice part is that I can easily upload to Facebook from my camera phone. The bad part is I can easily upload to Facebook. My sister is on a "vacation from Facebook" & I am thinking to join her ... do I really need it?

Well, you won't find me complaining about life.

My kids live each day without an IV-Pole attached.

After that experience, the rest is icing on the cake.

Truly.

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Lily kept telling Hannah to push her higher!!! Hannah loves that Lily lets her push her on the swing.

What a privilege to be the big sister after all those years of waiting!

Lily was hesitant to put on this jacket in the car when we got to the park. She said, "It doesn't match."

Oh my goodness! Of course, she was right but I didn't want her to be cold!

Feeding the deer the carrots!

I never noticed these animals at the farm before .... what ever are these creatures??

A friend of Hannah's from school joined us to feed the animals. A very fun outing!

And, oh my goodness, just melt my heart.

Look at her precious feet!!!!

I cherish this pumpkin & thank God every day for the joy of being her mother!

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"Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens..." Psalm 68:19

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All God's best from HOME,

Happy Valentine's Day!

2011-02-14T07:59:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentine's Day from us girls!!

Thank you, Lord, for your constant, continual,

unending love that never stops flowing.

Sick, Sick, Sick ...

2011-02-13T20:06:00.000-08:00

Girls in bed Friday night ... sick, sick, sick .. but still smiling!

On the way home from the doctor on Friday .. both of them slept most of the day, including the ride home from picking up the antibiotics!!

Sick of being sick over here.

Hannah has missed so much school this year (well, not as much as with Aplastic Anemia!!) & this past week was no different!! On Thursday night she started complaining that her ear was hurting. Not like Hannah to complain of pain. I asked her on a scale of 1 -10, what is your pain level. A "6" she says ... which for her is very high! I gave her pain meds & said we'd go to the doctor in the morning.

I turned off the alarm for school knowing she wasn't going. That morning Lily was warm & coughing all over the place as well. The girls & I went to the doctor and BOTH had double ear infections. Hannah's temp hit 106 and Lily's was around 102. Just nuts.

The most adorable thing is how they both take care of each other -- even when they feel totally miserable. On Friday morning I was walking Hannah back to my bed from the bathroom -- she'd been laying on the bathroom floor because the room was spinning (from her high fever). On the way back Lily pops into the room to hand Hannah a special project she had made & glued together for her (a bunch of scrap papers all glued to a big piece of paper -- oh the joy of sissors & a glue stick!). As sick as Hannah was, she took the paper & said in the sweetest voice, "oh thank you Lily -- I love it" So cute!!

Later that night, we were camped out in my room watching What About Bob (I've lost count how many times we have watched that movie since Hannah got it for Christmas from Auntie Mom & fam). Lily was coughing & all of the sudden started throwing up. Hannah jumps out of bed & starts patting Lily saying "it's OK, honey ... it's Ok, honey," while I was grabbing towels & a wet wash cloth.

So sweet how these sisters love each other & look after each other even when they both feel downright miserable.

I am a blessed mom to my two most precious girls ... what a gift each day is ... even when I am cleaning up barf, scheduling medications & going a bit nuts with it all.

I still count it as joy ... life at home!!

All God's Best from HOME in KY,

"I recognize you from your blog ..."

2011-02-07T18:40:00.000-08:00

On Friday, Hannah & I were out for some one-on-one time. In the parking lot on the way back to the car, a lady stopped us & said "I recognize you from your blog."

She told Hannah she had been praying for her the entire time she was sick.

Imagine that?

Who would have ever thought we'd move across the country & run into someone who "knows" us.

What a blessing to connect with our new friend, Holly.

Holly invited us to a Chinese New Year party for the very next evening. The girls & I went- including my cousin, Blair, who was in town to hang out for part of the weekend. We had an great night, thanks to Holly, & enjoyed our first Chinese New Year party with other Families with Children from China. It was amazing to see so many families with kids from China.

Of course, Lily was convinced it was her party and I just encouraged saying "yes, Lily, it is your party!!" Why not? It was her party, right??.

Really -- the kindness of people just amazes me! Thank you, Holly for making our weekend so special -- the Chinese New Year party was an evening we will never forget & I look forward to getting together with you soon!

Meanwhile, Hannah went from the stomach flu at the beginning of last week to getting a chest cold over the weekend. She was coughing pretty bad today so I got her checked out to make sure it wasn't pneumonia or the flu. Everything came back clear -- just something viral so no anti-biotic needed.

Since we were in the presence of so many medical professionals, I had her blood counts checked & they all came back NORMAL! Thank you, Lord!!!!! Hannah handled all three pokes to get her blood drawn like a total champ. She really could give lessons to kids (and some adults) on how to deal with the needle sticks.

I am still in awe of God's healing on Hannah's life. Even when I am stressed out or my back goes out for NO reason or things just seem all wrong -- every day is a blessing & I don't take any this life for granted!!

Here are some snapshots from the Chinese New Year Party:

In honor of Chinese New Year, Hannah & Lily got into the RED lipstick before we left for the party. Despite wiping it off the remnants remained....how lovely!?!

Sisters Forever!

Making a rabbit craft for The Year of The Rabbit

Thank you, Blair, for making the trip to KY ... WE LOVE YOU!!!!!

Making Rabbit cookies & tasting the frosting. Yum-O!

My crazy girls .. wouldn't have it any other way!!

All God's best from HOME in KY,

Catching Up ...

2011-02-01T22:12:00.000-08:00

Just a quick "catch up" to let everyone know we are still alive here in cold Kentucky!

Here are some pictures from the past week or so ....

My adorable mom being caught on camera by Lily.

Lily having a picnic with her babies!

Breakfast time with Grandma!

A last minute picture with Grandma .. and of course, Lily refused to really smile. Such a ham!!!

My sister, Miriam, came to visit for one night .. thanks, Miriam, for making the drive. I love you so much!

And here is our little dog that is in desperate need of a haircut. Lily documents it all!

Lots going on over here.

Let's just say -- life is downright H.A.R.D right now -- it is not pretty but none of the details are making it onto my blog.

Truly the Lord is sustaining me & I know it is HIS grace carrying me through each day.

If tears cause weight loss, I'll be rail before this is done.   Unfortunately, I don't think it works that way. :-)

My Mom was here & what an emotional support she is to me. Thank you, Lord, for my mother!!!!

Unfortunately my mom got the stomach flu the night before she left & has been sick for days ... sorry, Mom! Turns out there is a nasty stomach flu going around (anyone else have it??).

Hannah came down with it tonight plus Lily has a cold & now, a fever. I am not complaining at all but tonight has been a lot of holding Hannah's hair back & making sure Lily is "all good" in the midst of not feeling well.

Just really hoping I don't get anything because nurse-mommy must stay well :-) All you moms out there know what I mean!

What can I say?

Even in the midst of life's worst circumstances & deeper pain that I have ever experienced: God is good and His tender love is carrying me through this tragic time.

After life in a hospital room with Hannah for 160+ nights & finding God's goodness in the midst of that time I see His goodness even in the midst of this difficult time. I went for a walk on Sunday & was reminded in an extraordinary way that The Lord HIMSELF is a Lamp unto my feet & a Light unto my path.

I am forever God's precious, treasured child .... and a piece of paper from the state of Kentucky won't change that.

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"For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart." 1 Samuel 16:7

" The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you." Psalm 9:9-10

All God's best from HOME,

Blessed with Encouragement

2011-01-20T18:11:00.000-08:00

To the many, many kind friends & strangers that have sent encouraging messages, emails, phone calls -- THANK YOU!

How blessed I am with so many people that follow our journey & took time to encourage my broken heart. I am so thankful.

This blog will not become a "throw-someone-under-the-bus" blog but I will continue to be honest about my own emotional struggles on life's journey. As I always have been.

This blog is still just me chronicling life as mom to Hannah & Lily.

Nothing has changed.

Well, now I take out the trash .... but the blog is the same.

My mom arrived today (just in time for another Louisville snowstorm!).

What a blessing my mom has been through these past several years. Well, really for every day of my life!

She was such an emotional support through Hannah's illness & now with what is going on. I am so grateful & truly cannot imagine a mom that did not just love me, accept me & care for me the way she does. It doesn't mean that my mom doesn't challenge me -- but regardless she loves me. Unconditional love. No strings attached kind of love. Not every girl in this world can boast of a mom like that & I don't take any of her "amazinngness" for granted!!

The girls are doing great & Hannah thinks she has won the lottery with all these snow days in Kentucky. The hill in our backyard continues to provide lots of entertainment for sledding adventures. The girls love each other so much & I just marvel at their tremendous relationship. They have been doing sleepovers on Lily's floor & even though they are on the floor they both sleep SO GOOD!! I think it just has to do with being together -- what a gift!!

Last week I talked with a dear elderly lady from our church in California (Maureen Brians, for you PFB'ers). She is a dear friend of mine & prayed with me on the phone & in her prayer said "Lord, the path to you is not straight ....but we know we are headed to you ...". She prayed a lot more but her words were such an enouragement ot my heart. So true -- the path to God is not straight and usually the turns are most unexpected.

I always feel the Lord near me -- even when I am yelling at the windshield in my car because of my current situation. God knows every bit of my pain, anguish & anger. I don't try to hide a bit from Him -- he knows my every thought & even the slightest groanings of my heart. Thank you, Lord, that nothing is a secret from you!!!!

I am blessed. Truly. I wake up & think how thankful I am for two healthy girls, for the family that I was raised in, for life long friends that love me and for blog-mates that come along side to encourage my heart.

Know that all your words of encouragement ministered to my heart -- thank you!!!

Here are some recent pictures of life at home from Lily's small digital camera.

.

Lily taking pictures of her big sister! Peace.

Lily getting ready for a "fashion show". She dressed herself & came into the living room to show me & Hannah her stuff.

And here is her strut as she walks the runway in our kitchen ... hilarious!!!!

Lily & Hannah going out for some fun in the snow. Hannah totally looks out for Lily.

I love how Hannah's hand is behind Lily ... protecting her precious little sister on the snowy walkway!

Hannah waiting for the school bus to arrive. Can you believe we have to bundle up here in KY? A big change!

Matching skirts and truly happy girls!!

All God's best from Kentucky,

Letting Go

2011-01-15T08:43:00.000-08:00

I am letting go of what people will think ...

Letting go of what people will say ...

Letting go of the fear of being judged when people have no business judging what they do not know..

Letting go of the deceit ...

Letting go of someone that wants to live another life separate from me while I am living this life ...

Letting go of the man that is not the person I thought he was ...

I am letting go because the shattered trust in my marriage cannot be rebuilt on a sandy beach of half-truths without an ounce of forthrightness ....

So judge me all you want but the Lord knows my heart & my reputation lies before Him. The Lord knows my pain & He knows what I have endured while protecting the reputation of my spouse.

For now, the girls & I are figuring this out one day at a time. Hannah & I have had lots & lots of really good talks and the door is always open. I am amazed what she sees in all of this -- you just can't fool kids.

If I have learned anything these past few years, it is this: nothing is a surprise to God.

Not one detail of my life comes as a surprise to Him. He knew all of this before the foundations of the earth & I can trust Him.

Trust Him with what the future holds.

Trust Him for His peace that surpasses understanding.

Trust Him to comfort my broken heart & the hearts of my girls.

Trust Him to do more for my girls than I could ever think or imagine ...

"I thank you for the bitter things
They've been a friend to grace,
They've driven me from the paths of ease
To storm the secret place." - Florence White Willett

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When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze, For I am the LORD, your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior. Isa. 43:2-3

Please pray for us as we are walking through an incredibly painful time in our lives ...

All God's best from HOME,

Goodbye Twenty Ten!

2011-01-03T22:59:00.000-08:00

I have been busy doing digital scrapbook pages from 2010 (I print these & make albums for each of the girls).

Here are a few of the pages:

Forgive me for not blogging more frequently ... not that anyone really cares (right, Blair? ha, ha!).

There has been a lot going on but none of it has been caught on film -- my nice digital camera went on strike!! I will have to rely on Lily as our family photographer. She is talented as you can tell from my Christmas posting!

We are back into the swing of things here in Kentucky! The girls had a great Christmas break with back to back weeks with cousins in PA & Indiana. What a treat for them!! For Hannah it was a very extended break due to strep throat the week before break plus school closings due to snow. Hannah was so super excited to get back to the business of 3rd grade -- she could hardly fall asleep last night. The joys of life as a healthy 9 year old!!

I know I say it all the time but the gratefulness I feel for her healthy life is so completely overwhelming. To see her skip down the driveway (well, actually it was more like a "cat walk" down the runway) to get on the bus this morning & go to school is still a complete miracle to me. Not one day goes by without complete thanks & gratitude to the Lord for her life. Today was no different, particularly as we celebrated her 1 year anniversary "back to school"!!! Thank you, Lord!!!!!

Tonight at dinner Hannah said "I give this meal a "9". It would be a "10" if there weren't green beans on the plate." Oh my goodness ... leave it to Hannah! The girl cracks me up!!

For breakfast today Lily wanted pizza ... we had pizza last night but there were no leftovers (gee, why??). She didn't believe there wasn't any pizza left so I pulled out a frozen pizza & we started this week off right: pizza for breakfast!! I should have served eggs for dinner tonight & we could have called it even.

God has been so faithful to me in every way & in every situation so no matter what storms lie ahead in 2011, I can trust Him with all my heart & lean not on my own understanding.

Especially when my understanding is nothing.

I have no resolutions for 2011 -- just to restfully depend on the Lord.

All God's best from HOME,

Christmas from Lily's Perspective

2010-12-26T23:08:00.000-08:00

Hannah gave Lily her digital camera for Christmas.

A gift that Lily LOVES!!!!

After opening the camera before services on Christmas Eve Lily proceeded to document her 3rd Christmas in America.

Christmas 2010, from Lily's perspective:

Me & Hannah at my sister's place before services.

Christmas Eve services from Lily's perspective ... the screens up in front of the church

the people sitting in front of us (not good that the flash went off for this photo ...oops!)

Cousin Micah from Israel ... Lily adores him!! At nap time & nighttime she asks "Will Micah be here when I wake up?"

Grandma capturing my dad opening his gifts ... adorable!

Lily's new socks & candy ... don't tell her that the Tootsie Roll can was supposed to be full. She will never know the difference. Yum-O!

My dad & his Droid phone ... and our dog from Kentucky!

Thanks, Lil, I am trying to pop a zit here .... do you mind!!!?!?!?

Happier times with white zinfindel!

Cousin Dave checking out Hannah's new phone (that was the gift that KNOCKED her socks off!!!!) I will try to post the video of when she got the phone. She went C-R-A-Z-Y!!!! Many reasons why my 9 year old now needs a phone. I am well aware that 9 is VERY young for a phone.

Cousins Sarah at the Christmas dinner table

We all enjoyed the meal immensely!

Cousin Dave ... love you, dude!

Lily's view at the Christmas dinner table

Taking pictures of herself ... Lily & cousin Sarah!

Ooops ... thumb in front of part of the lens!!!

My parents gave the girls Build a Bears with their voices inside the animals. Precious gifts that they love!!!

Happy days for my girls!

God is good & we continue to stand in awe at His amazing work in our lives!!!

Merry Christmas from us in very snowy Philadelphia!! !

If you get a text from a 502 number it might be Hannah ... in 2 days she has become a texting champion! Good thing for unlimited text service!!!

Time on the East Coast

2010-12-23T23:11:00.000-08:00

I woke up this morning and before the day began I started to feel overwhelmed that it was going to be a hard day ... for many reasons.

And then, thankfully, my mind woke up & I remembered:

I have no reason to complain,

no reason to feel down &

every reason to be thankful.

I am a blessed mother to 2 precious girls.

Two absolute miracles.

Three years ago at this time I was still waiting for Lily in China. I knew nothing about her. Just waiting & trusting the Lord for the gift of daughter number two. Those days of waiting were sometimes so completely agonizing.

Two years ago at this time I was at the NIH with Hannah for her first round of treatement to fight Aplastic Anemia.

Life has been difficult these past few years.

I sure hope I am not a downer to any of you blog readers but life has been tough and I don't candy coat any of it ... to myself or to anyone else.

Despite life's difficult circumstances, my kids are healthy -- I am healthy, I have a loving family & the Lord that encourages my heart to "not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself -- each day has enough trouble of its own."

God is good.

He has been faithful to me in every way.

I can trust in Him.

I can rest in Him.

I am thankful for the Lord's peace that surpasses understanding -- even in the midst of confusion, difficulty & despair.

The girls are enjoying an East Coast vacation with my family. It has been nice to be off from the routine of school & just be with my family.

We were able to drive the 12 hours from Kentucky. So nice to pack up & hit the road without having to worry about flights, TSA, baggage, etc.

Hopefully I can get my camera to cooperate & I will be able to upload some Christmas Eve pictures tomorrow night.

Hannah's socks are going to be knocked off by one of her Christmas gifts -- cannot wait to see her face!!!

All God's best from the East Coast,

Beyond Words

2010-12-21T14:33:00.000-08:00

Sweet Ashlynn lost her wonderful mother.

Darryl no longer has his amazing wife.

An incredible teacher is gone & our girl scout troop leader that tried to get us to do something other than crafts is no longer here.

She is with the Lord and with Roisin getting the party ready for the rest of us!

Shay is no longer in pain & no longer suffering through cancer that just keeps spreading.

And for that,

I am thankful.

Despite our pain and the incredible loss for so many.

Shay, you were the bravest of brave, you encouraged Hannah through her illness & even came to see her at the hospital, which I know for you WAS A HUGE DEAL.

You fought til the bitter end for Ashlynn & you were blessed to have a husband by your side that is an example to every man.

When I left for Kentucky I told you I would still be "down the street" -- well, girlfriend, the day will come when we will be neighbors again, except this time we will walk the streets of gold!

Can't wait to see you & Roisin .... Thanks for being a friend, an example, a sister, a neighbor & an role model to my girls.

We will always be here for Ashlynn and for your Bubba.

You will never be forgotten.

Trip to Check Numbers & Normal Stuff

2010-12-14T18:28:00.000-08:00

So last week on Wednesday night Hannah started complaining of "I don't feel good".

Thursday she stayed home from school & sat on the couch almost the entire day. I just thought she was fighting something normal.

Then Friday morning she slept LONG past when the bus would normally pick her up at the end of our driveway. When I woke her up, again, she was complaining of "not feeling good."

So I know it shouldn't ....

But my heart just dropped.

Hit the floor.

Tumbled down the street.

Down the hill & into the gutter of thoughts of "oh my goodness .. what if???"

So off we went to the Pediatric Hematology / Oncology office in downtown Louisville.

The waiting area was jam packed. Packed because they were closing at noon and because there are A LOT of sick kids!

I made nice with the receptionist & got Hannah a prescription to go across the street to the Children's Hospital outpatient to have her numbers checked.

Hannah's blood got drawn through a finger prick .... & we waited for the CBC results.

Just me & Hannah.

Once again, the two of us in hospital setting.

My mind was R.A.C.I.N.G. .....

the nurse came back out & handed me the report with Hannah's numbers:

ALL NORMAL

I just started balling.

Poor Hannah. I hold it together so much for her but this time I just couldn't. All the emotions of everything just came pouring out.

We talked on our walk back to the car. Real casual about if her numbers had dropped & she said "I would have to go for a bone marrow transplant".

We talked about it like we were talking about taking my car to get washed.

Just so casual..... and it is very much NOT A CASUAL THING!!

A surreal moment for me but I have to keep it all normal for her .. even though her numbers are recovered right now, the possibility of relapse is still there.

I trust the Lord for EACH & EVERY day & I know He will continue to guide & direct our steps ... even if they end up pacing the halls of a hospital unit again one day.

Monday was a snow day (Hannah's first EVER!) but before the day was done Hannah had a high fever & a sore throat.

So guess what? Miss Hannah now has strep throat!

As much as I'd like to not have strep throat going around --- it is a blessing to have a child that can fight an infection with normal anti-biotics, hot chocolate & lots of love!!

God is good and I am forever grateful for His unconditional love & the miracle of Hannah's healing .....

All God's best from HOME,

A Day in the Life of Lily

2010-12-08T21:31:00.000-08:00

Lily loves to be behind the camera.

Hannah has a small digital camera that she got while she was in the hospital.

Lily loves to hijack that camera & snap away.

Enjoy!!!

A Day in the Life of Lily:

Me after I brushed her hair in her room.

Kim, notice the photos on the wall that she taped up near her bed. A few are upside down -- all are covered in tape.

Send tape for Christmas ... she can't get enough of it!

Basket with puzzles & a photo of her & her foster sister, Meredith.

We love you Mei-Mei!!

Elmo!!!

She LOVED this picture: her baby & her shoes!!

Mom jeans .. while we wait at the auto repair place.

Self portrait. What a beauty!!!

While I was making a purchase at J.C. Penny's

Shoppers waiting while mommy took forever talking to the nice lady.

This lady suspected Lily was a Chinese spy.

I was holding her on the escalator & she was literally yelling at these people, in an "Auntie Mom" kind of voice, (NOT QUIET):

"SAY CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

They were not interested in the Lily-Ratzzi

A look below ...

Life's good in a mini van with a DVD player ... what a country!

Pile o' junk in the pocket in front of Lil in the mini van

The view from her window on the road leading up to our house ...

This child is a dream.

She cracks me up.

She is therapy for my soul.

She is exhausting.

She is brilliant.

She is precious.

She is treasured.

She is liked. And she knows it --

Last night Hannah cheered along with the Varsity cheerleaders for part of the high school basketball game.
Lily was in the stands screaming away "GO MUSTANGS!!!" (like her sister was yelling) and people were turning around to look at Lily ... because she is so adorable.

Lily just kept smiling & looked at Jim and said "people like me."

Yes, Lil, people like you.

Actually, people LOVE YOU!

I pray you always have such a wonderful self-image!!!!!!